François Hollande's lesson on how to offend a country's national hero

Canadian's amongst you will be familiar with the name Kevin Vickers and will probably be able to put a face to the name.

And there's a fair bet that those of you from other countries will at least know what the 58-year-old is famous for, even if you don't know what he looks like and the name doesn't immediately ring the proverbial bell.

Vickers is the sergeant-at-arms at the House of Commons of Canada in Ottawa.

Kevin Vickers (screenshot CBC news)

And on October 22, he was the man who killed gunman Michael Zehaf-Bibeau who had earlier fatally shot a soldier, Nathan Cirillo, guarding the national war memorial in the capital before going on a shooting rampage in the nearby parliamentary building.

Vickers has since been hailed as a hero, both at home and abroad, proving that the largely ceremonial role he normally plays also has an accompanying serious element in being "responsible for safety and security" within the grounds of the parliamentary building.

Indeed, as if to emphasise just how far Vickers' fame had spread, Hollande, paid tribute to him during a speech to parliamentarians from both chambers of the Canadian parliament on Monday, "saluting his courage" and saying that Vickers was now "a hero across the world".

François Hollande addressing parliamentarians in Canada (screenshot BFM TV)

Hollande, sometimes not always up to speed on who to praise or to whom his condolences should be made (see the last sentence in this post) while on an official trip, seemed to have been well briefed by his accompanying advisors during his state visit to Canada- the first by a French president since 1987.

Or had he?

Because just moments before, Hollande had, according to a report on Europe 1, appeared to all but ignore Vickers - or at the very least not recognise the man he would later describe as "a hero across the world."

It happened as Hollande entered the parliamentary building with apparently both the presidents of the senate and the house of commons there to greet him.

They were accompanied by...well, none other than Vickers who would, in his role as sergeant-at-arms, shortly afterwards show Hollande and the Canadian prime minister, Stephen Harper, to their seats.

And all Hollande could offer Vickers - in terms of a personal face-to-face tribute - was a simple handshake...of a man who seemingly hadn't a clue who the other person was.



And that, dear reader, is a classic Hollande lesson on how to offend your hosts while on an official visit and yet another example of his seemingly muddled understanding of protocol or grasp on international events.

Remember his recent renaming of the Syrian town of Kobane as "Konabe?

Or, while on a trip to Japan in 2013 the tribute he paid to the Japanese nationals who had died in the Algerian hostage crisis earlier in the year by referring to them as "Chinese"?

François Hollande renames Kobane, "Konabe"

Even if you're not especially interested in what's making the news, the chances are that you've heard of Kobane.

The town on the border of Syria and Turkey has been the scene of fighting between Islamic State militants and Kurdish defenders for the past month and has received extensive coverage internationally.


So you would think that leaders from around the world would not only be familiar with what's happening there but would also be able to say the town's name properly.

All right, there might be differences in spelling, accents and stress between different languages (and those helpful people at Wikipedia provide a few alternatives) but there's surely consensus as to the order in which both the letters and the three syllables come.

Right?

Wrong.

Not, apparently, if you happen to be the French president, François Hollande.

François Hollande at the Institut du monde arabe (screenshot from Le Petit Journal on Canal +)

Proving once again that he is a verbal law unto himself, Hollande managed to mangle the town's name not once, but twice, during and after a speech he gave at the Institut du monde arabe (Arab World Institute) on Tuesday.

Kobane in Hollande-speak became Konabe.

And both he and his advisors seemed oblivious to the fact that he couldn't pronounce the town's name correctly.

You can hear Hollande's gaffe from 12 minutes 45 seconds until 13 minutes 45 seconds - the  "L'instant président" segment of the "Le Petit Journal" on Canal + with host Yann Barthès broadcast on Tuesday evening.

Classic Flanby...unless, as Barthès pointed out, Hollande really was referring to the village of Konabe in Japan (yes, it exists).

Now that brings back memories.

Wasn't it in Japan back in June 2013 that Hollande, while wanting to pay tribute to the 10 Japanese nationals who had died in the Algerian hostage crisis in January of the same year actually expressed his condolences to the Chinese?

Valls en déplacement pour un parking - Le Petit Journal du 14/10

Friday's French music break - Compagnie Blanca Li, "Robot!"

Friday's French music break this week is something a little different.

First of all it's not French.

And second of all (don't you just hate it when people say that?) it's not music.

Instead it a performance of "Robot!" (with music of course) from the Blanca Li dance company.

It's the Spanish choreographer's latest creation and one which premiered at the Festival Montpellier Danse 2013 and then ran for a series of 11 dates at the Théâtre des Champs-Élysées in Paris at the end of last year and the beginning of 2014 before going on a national tour of France.

Images (screenshot from video trailer of "Robot!" on Blanca Li official site)

Li sets out to explore the relationship between human beings and machines - in all their forms including robots, computers, vending terminals, cash distributors, barcodes and GPS.

And in the process she poses questions such as "whether our robotic alter egos will one day express feelings?" And if so, "would they be a reflection of what humanity unconsciously wants to represent?"

To help her explore these (and other) issues, Li enrolled the help of the most bizarre and "wonderfully whimsical" music composed and played by the Japanese art group Maywa Denki and their "elaborately over-engineered electronic and mechanical instruments and devices".

And the miniature NAO robots (provided by the French robotics company Aldebaran), taking their very first steps, "dancing" in unison or giving a rendition of "Besame Mucho" (with Li's voice).

Images (screenshot from video trailer of "Robot!" on Blanca Li official site)

In the midst of all this are the company's eight dancers who put on a sometimes graceful, often gymnastic and always exhausting physical display.

Sure, "Robot!" isn't everyone's choreographed cup of tea but it's entertaining and innovative nonetheless.

And there's something rather thought provoking surely about the idea of those in the audience perhaps pondering (or not) as to what the heck they're doing watching a robot "sing and dance".

There are still a handful of dates scheduled in France for both ""Robot!" and another show the company is currently performing, "Elektro kif".

You can find out when and where on the official website.

For the moment though, here's a glimpse of what you might have missed...possibly without regret. But there again dance, just any other art form, is a matter of personal taste.

Welcome to Geneva - Switzerland's capital, according to TF1

It would seem that France's main private television channel, TF1, has decided to follow a lead set by the country's president, François Hollande, in showing just how geographically challenged it can be at times.

Remember Hollande's gaffe back in June while on a trip to Japan when he mistakenly expressed his condolences to the Chinese rather than the Japanese for those killed during a hostage crisis in Algeria in January?

Well, TF1 decided to go closer to home for its foot-in-mouth blooper.

It came during a recent pre-recorded (and therefore perfectly editable) lunchtime news report as part of a delightful series "La France à bicyclette".

It took viewers on a trip around Lac Léman (or Lake Geneva if you like, because it's one and the same thing) from Lausanne to...Lausanne. A round trip.

Gorgeous scenery - both on the Swiss and French sides - although guess where the traffic was a little more difficult?

Cyclists take to the streets of the "Swiss capital Geneva" (screenshot from TF1 report)

Breaks for meals and meet-ups with other halves - enjoying the countryside and a leisurely lunch before setting off again to the encounter the liveliness.....of the capital, Geneva!

Listen at two minutes and three seconds.




Now, it might be all right for far flung countries and their broadcasters to get things wrong geographically speaking - and CNN certainly has in the past and will probably also do in the future

But how can a French reporter get his (in this case) information so obviously wrong about a country with which it shares a border and to some extent a culture?

Easily probably, especially if there's nobody around to take a listen to the piece before it's broadcast.

France's first automatic dog washing machine

Fed up of the struggle involved in washing your pooch when it returns muddy and smelly from a walk in the forest?

Tired of having to clean the bathroom after you've perhaps wrestled with an unwilling dog intent on escaping as you, shampoo in one hand, shower head in the other, succeed only in flooding the place?

Or simply no longer willing to make regular and sometimes costly trips to a specialist groomer to have your faithful four-legged friend washed and blow-dried?

Help is finally at hand in the shape of Shower Dog Corner - a washing machine for man's best friend - now available in France.

Shower Dog Corner (screenshot TV Sud report)

Actually it has been up and running since March, but it was only this past week that the cameras of the local station TV Sud made their way to Montpellier to see how it works.

All right the Japanese have been doing it to their hounds - and cats come to that -  for some time, and pet owners in other countries have also been getting in on the act.

But it's apparently a first in France, a salon in Montpellier which offers a half-hour session in, what to all intents and purposes is, a dog washing machine.

The creator of Shower Dog Corner, Eduardo Segura, is Spanish and it was while watching a television report on its success in Spain that Mauro Balbis hit on the idea of introducing it on to the French market.

"I saw a report on "30 millions d'amis" and I got in touch with Eduardo," Balbis told TV Sud.

"When I went to see him and saw how the machine worked and how simple it was, I was won over."

So much so that he ordered one and set up shop.

Mauro Balbis (screenshot TV Sud report)

The whole process takes less than half an hour. You simply put your dog in the machine, close the door (of course) choose the programme and pay your money before sitting back to watch Fido spin.

No, of course that's not what happens - not the rotating part anyway.

Rather the dog is automatically sprayed with water and shampoo for just four minutes and then blow-dried for the remaining time.

Just in case you're worried, the machine is both SPA and veterinary school-approved, uses less water than would be required during a session at a conventional parlour and doesn't get rid or the protective grease contained in the fur.

It's also best for big dogs and "those of a nervous disposition" who might be refused entry to a more conventional parlour.

If, for some reason, Fido doesn't look too happy or begins to panic, you can always open the door and let the poor thing out.

Right Mrs Kipling, in the car. We're off to Montpellier.

Mrs Kipling?

Mrs Kipling

Insolite : Lavomatique pour chien à Montpellier par TVSud

French president François Hollande confuses Japan with China

You know from time-to-time how you hear a story about a singer who greets fans at the beginning of a concert with, for example, a massive "Good evening Clermont-Ferrand" when the gig is taking place almost 150 kilometres away in the city of Saint Etienne.

That happened to one of France's "favourite" (well at least most successful over the decades) singers, Johnny Hallyday, in December last year.

It's understandable perhaps, given the punishing schedule of a tour and musicians don't necessarily have a huge entourage of speechwriters and advisors keeping tabs on what they're saying.

Not so for political leaders.

They rarely travel without an army of flunkies on hand.

François Hollande speaking at a press conference in Japan (screenshot from AFP report)

And there's really no excuse when they get things ever-so wrong and that must be especially true when they're French.

After all the country is famous and proud for its tradition of diplomacy, isn't it?

"French is the language of..." and all that.

So François Hollande's gaffe while on an official visit to Japan last week surely counts as one that'll ensure the French president is top of the class for a while yet when it comes to diplomatic blunders.

Hollande was speaking at a press conference in Tokyo and, while referring to the Algerian hostage crisis in January in which 10 Japanese died said...well take a listen for yourself.




Yes, you heard correctly. Hollande said "Chinese" rather than "Japanese" - and didn't even bother rectifying his mistake.

What a chump!

That "special" TV moment between IMF head Christine Lagarde and CNBC journalist Maria Bartiromo

Recently Christine Lagarde, the head of the International Monetary Fund,  appeared, as she has done regularly, on the US-based satellite and cable television business news channel CNBC.

Facing her was the channel's Maria Bartiromo, a journalist with a proven track record, author of several books and recipient of various awards.

Christine Lagarde and Maria Bartiromo (screenshot montage from CNBC video)

The main thrust of what Lagarde had to say was that "austerity upon austerity doesn't work," with Bartiromo pushing to find out whether Greece would be offered a better deal.

So the scene is set for an interview between two very capable women with Bartiromo quizzing Lagarde on the world global economy (of all things) just ahead of the the annual meetings of the IMF and the World Bank Group in Tokyo.

But remember this was television - a medium in which some journalists, even the most experienced and accomplished can fall into the trap of considering themselves to be at least equal if not sometimes better than the person they're interviewing - or at least giving the appearance of what they have to say and their take on an issue, matters.

You know the sort of thing: a journalist specialising in a certain field becomes the expert qualified to share with viewers, listeners or readers, their point of view.

"Hello subjectivity" and "Goodbye objectivity".

Although there are several examples earlier on in the interview of Bartiromo chipping in with her comments on what Lagarde is saying, take a listen to the exchange that takes place between the two when France is mentioned (fast forward to eight minutes and 57 seconds in the accompanying video - you can watch it here).

Lagarde of course is French and before taking over from Dominique Strauss-Kahn (yes the job has become something of a Gallic domain in recent years) she was this country's finance minister.

Bartiromo wanted to find out (really?) Lagarde's thoughts on the 75 per cent tax rate the French government is planning to impose on those earning more than €1 million annually, asking whether she found it "appropriate".

Ever the international diplomat that she has become, Lagarde was not to be drawn saying she was going to take questions on France for obvious reasons.

"Because it's your country?" asked Bartiromo.

"Correct," replied Lagarde.

But that wasn't enough for the journalist who wanted an answer to the question she had "posed", even if now forced, in part, to give it herself.

"It does seem a little aggressive from a policy standpoint," began Bartiromo.

"Do you think we could see that kind of tax rates in other countries? I mean, this is a real debate. I understand you don't want to criticise or comment on something going on in France. But you have to be thinking about this," she finished, allowing Lagarde a little more room for manœuvre without having to appear to comment openly on internal French politics.

A clever rephrasing of the question from Bartiromo to try to tease out an opinion or a point of view that might otherwise be buried under a blanket of diplomatic doublespeak?

Or a clumsy technique of appearing to the devil's advocate but perhaps letting slip her own thoughts on the subject?

You decide.

Either way, for such a normally dry subject, it's a delicious TV moment as both women retain their poise during what could have been an instant of dead air silence.

Satire - France seen by foreigners and the French

Perhaps you recall a recent post here, "Europe according to bigots".

It featured satirical maps by Bulgarian-born graphic designer Yanko Tsvetkov and illustrated how the continent was viewed by others around the world by relying on clichés and stereotypes.

There's a similar set of maps doing the rounds concentrating specifically on La Belle France - as it's seen not only from abroad but also by the French.

Of course they're not to be taken seriously, but hidden behind the caricature isn't there just a slight element of truth?

For the Japanese, the country is portrayed as just one big tourist destination while the Chinese are only interested in Paris and its suburbs because both give them the chance to get their hands on businesses at a knock-down rate.

From the French point of view, there's one showing environmentalist and anti-globalisation campaigner José Bové's view of a country covered in McDonald's outlets for example.

And another emphasises Parisians' blinkered view that the City of Lights is the centre of the Universe and anything else is...well provincial.

Here are a few screengrabs showing UK and US views as well as those of some French.

Click on the images to enlarge

(screengrab from wikistrike.com)

(screengrab from wikistrike.com)

For the rest you can go here.

Cécile Duflot's cartographical fluff

Cécile Duflot is without doubt an educated, articulate and ambitious woman.

Cécile Duflot (screenshot BFM TV)

Her political career has been what the national daily Le Monde has described as "meteoric".

She joined Les Verts (the Greens) in 2001 and became the party's national secretary in 2006.

When it merged with Europe Écologie last year, she took over where she had left off by becoming the first national secretary of Europe Écologie - Les Verts.

The 35-year-old has become a regular guest on current affairs programmes, and right now of course, her media savvy approach and ability to express her thinking and ideas in a well-informed yet intelligible manner are more than welcomed and appreciated by many journalists.

You might not agree with what she says, but there's no denying she has something to say and as if to drive home that point she figured at position 32 in the list of the American magazine Foreign Policy's global thinkers in 2010.

But even the best and brightest are prone to mistakes.

And such was the case when Duflot, who holds a masters in geography (remember that) appeared as a guest on BFM TV's Wednesday edition of its early evening news and current affairs programme hosted by Ruth Elkrief.

Asked about the risks of radioactive materials from the damaged nuclear reactors in Japan reaching French shores, Duflot said that nobody could say for certain at the moment.

"In theory the chances of it reaching mainland France are low," she said.

"The incident has happened in the southern hemisphere and in theory meteorological conditions should mean that the radioactivity will remain in the southern hemisphere. But we can never be certain."

Notice the slip-up?

Remember Duflot has a masters in geography.

Jacques-Emmanuel Saulnier (screenshot BFM TV)

Jacques-Emmanuel Saulnier, the spokesman for the French energy giant Areva, certainly did when he was asked a couple of minutes later whether it was true that France's nuclear power facilities were as safe as the country's politicians maintained.

"Before answering that, and without being a geographical expert, I would just like to invite Cécile Duflot to take a look at a globe of the world," he began.

"Because as far as I know Japan is actually in the northern hemisphere."

Oops.


Cécile DUFLOT par BFMTV

Thief steals thousands of euros from sleeping passengers on Air France flight

Anyone knows that when you're in a busy place it's always sound advice to look after your personal possessions.

As in many a city worldwide, public transport operators in Paris make regular announcements warning passengers that pickpockets are about.

It's part and parcel of the "joys" of living and working in a large metropolitan area.

When it comes to flying though, the most travellers can normally expect is to be told to keep their own luggage in view at all times, and any left unattended will be "dealt with".

That's of course before you've checked in and made it on to the 'plane.

But once there, cocooned in your own little space, the chances are for the most part that your defences will be down and you'll feel more secure. Well apart from those who are terrified of flying, but that's quite another story.

And so it must have felt for passengers aboard the overnight Air France Tokyo-Paris flight on Tuesday.

Except for five of them travelling in business class, there was something of a rude awakening.

Because while they slept, a thief was busy at work, relieving them of around €4,000 worth of cash in various currencies.

The alarm was only raised shortly before landing, when one of the victims alerted staff that money had been stolen from her purse.

In other words the thief had been going about his or her business right under the noses of dozing passengers and the cabin crew. And nobody had noticed a thing.

The captain informed airport authorities of what had happened ahead of landing and police were on hand to greet the passengers when the 'plane arrived.

But after half an hour, they decided to allow all the passengers to disembark and it was only the five who had been robbed who were detained to make formal complaints.

So what does Air France, the airline, which in its advertising campaign encourages customers to feel almost as though they're flying in pure comfort without a care in the world, have to say about the incident?

Rude, arrogant, mean and moaning. Who? The French on holiday

Guess which nationality figures yet again amongst the most unwelcome when on holiday abroad - the French

For the third consecutive year they rate poorly in a survey of hoteliers carried out on behalf of the Internet travel agency Expedia.fr

Overall they're second from bottom, and are generally seen as rude, mean, complaining and arrogant.

So no clichés there.

Time maybe for the French to take a lesson from the Japanese, British and Canadians, those nationalities that filled the top three slots.

Bastille day (July 14) might have been an excuse for the French to show off their military might with the traditional parade down the Champs Elysées; this year's guest of honour was India.

And there was blanket morning television coverage, exhorting the wonders of the French defence capability and generally revelling in national pride.

All of course in memory of the storming of the Bastille 220 years ago and part of the country's celebration of...well...being France.

But there's perhaps a characteristic the French would like not to dwell on which has nothing to do with fierce nationalism and everything to do with how they're apparently perceived when abroad.

French tourists are pretty much the worst in the world, according to a recent study conducted amongst 4,500 hoteliers by TNS Infratest on behalf of Expedia.fr

They ranked 27th (out of 28 countries) well behind those that headed the list and the worst-placed Europeans.

Only one nationality ranked lower than the French - the Chinese.

The survey questioned hoteliers worldwide about how they found the behaviour of guests from different countries in a number of categories including , general attitude, politeness, discretion, tendency to complain and elegance.

The result doesn't make for pleasant reading as far as the French are concerned.

For a country which likes to think of itself as having a legendary "savoir-vivre" and gallantry, simple manners and good behaviour seem to be more myth than reality, if the survey is to be believed.

The French are the least generous - leaving smaller tips - top the class in complaining and are generally perceived as "impolite (read "rude").

A simple "hello, thank you and goodbye" would not go amiss from the French, and that of course in the local language, which is seen as part of the problem when they decide to venture abroad.

"On the whole we don't speak English or at the best very little," says Timothée de Roux, Expedia's marketing director, adding with remarkable perspicacity, "We speak French which not a great deal of the rest of the world does."

Evidently the French are not quite as willing (or able) to make the effort of the top-ranking Japanese.

Apart from that perennial language problem though, there's also the claim that the French are "mean". But de Roux says the "lack of generosity" might just be a cultural thing, especially when it comes to tipping, as it's simply not a tradition among the French.

In France, "service" is usually included in the bill, whereas in the United States it's common practice to leave (at least) 15 per cent.

"In comparison with other nationalities, the French tend not to travel abroad (90 per cent of them holiday in France) and when they do hoteliers find that they're not very generous and spend less," he said.

"And there's no longer a habit of leaving a tip in France."

One bright note perhaps as far as the French are concerned is that when it comes to "discretion" they rank fourth. Apparently they make less noise than their Italian and Spanish neighbours.

But on the whole they still have a long, long way to go to match the Japanese, and for the moment at least have yet again earned the tag of being among the world's worst tourists.