Life's a beach for Saudi king

Mirandole beach (screenshot BFM TV news report)

What do you do if you're the king of Saudi Arabia holidaying at your private villa on the Côte d'Azur in the south of France for a month with an entourage of around a 1,000 people and you discover there's a public beach (albeit small) at the foot of where you're staying?


The answer is simple really.

You flout the laws of the land, start constructing your own personal lift (after all, it would be too stressful to have to walk) and block access for anyone else.

It's a story that has been brewing for the past fortnight when French national media began reporting that preparations were underway for the impending one-month-long stay of the king of Saudi Arabia, Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud, at his luxury villa in the town of Vallauris.

"The White Palace on the water", Vallauris (screenshot BBC news report)

 To avoid any unwanted hoi polloi upsetting the king's holiday plans and to ensure his privacy and security (and that of his family), the Mirandole beach at the foot of the villa was closed temporarily while the necessary construction work (without permits) was undertaken.

Some locals, upset by the manner in which a public beach seemed to have been commandeered without any consultation  were concerned that the closure would be extended for the duration of king's visit.

It's a fear that has become a reality as, even though  Michelle Salucki, the mayor of Vallauris, put a temporary stop to the work and wrote to the French president, François Hollande, to argue against the de facto privatisation of public property, she was overruled by higher powers with the sous-préfet, Philippe Castanet, invoking the need to provide security for a visiting head of state and Hollande...well, not reacting at all.

Yes, it's all a question of security...oh and the not-so-small matter of purchasing power.

Cash rich and shopping happy Saudis apparently come with the reputation of spending - big time.

And several reports have appeared on French telly showing how pleased local (luxury, of course) shop owners are at the prospect of all that lovely lolly passing through their hands.

Sod principles and the fact that public beaches are exactly that - public - and supposedly accessible (although there are plenty of other exceptions that prove the rule) to all.

And ditto for the petition that has so far attracted over 100,000 signatures insisting that the beach should be "available for the benefit of all".

"I'm talking about the equality of citizens before the law and the respect of coastal law," local councillor Jean-Noel Falcou said in  BBC news report (see, this story has captured the interest of media outside of France).

"A natural area, a public beach, is an inalienable. It's part of our common property. The point we wanted to make is that not everything can be bought."

Sadly Monsieur Falcou, it appears it can if the power behind the money is one authorities don't wish to offend.



Vallauris: la famille royale saoudienne veut... par afp

"Hey honey, where's Junior?" Parents "forget" son at a roadside rest area

"Home alone" might only have been a 1990 film dreamt up by scriptwriters as a comedy in which Macaulay Culkin played the part of an eight-year-old boy mistakenly left behind when his parents fly off to Paris for their Christmas hols.

But let's face it, fact can be - and often is - stranger than fiction as the parents of an eight-year-old French boy can attest to after their weekend "lapse of memory".

They reportedly "forgot" their son on the side of the road, leaving him at a rest area and only realising he was missing half an hour later.

Lourdes Basilica (Wikipedia, author Milorad Pavlek)

The couple from the suburbs of Paris were on their way to the market town of Lourdes at the foot of the Pyrénées in southwestern France.

It is of course famous as a destination for Catholic pilgrimage and alleged miraculous healings.

They had set off on their holidays early on Saturday morning; mum, dad and three children in a camping car.

The roads were pretty busy with holidaymakers, just as they are every Saturday in August in France.

As Agence France Presse reports, at around nine o'clock in the evening, after having completed just over 700 of their 800 kilometre journey, the couple decided to take a break, and they stopped at a rest area on the nationale 21 in the département of Gers.

A few minutes later, refreshed and ready for the final stretch, they set off again, and it was only when they arrived in Lourdes that they realised one of their children was missing.

They immediately rang the emergency services, to be told that their son was with the police who had been alerted by other motorists who had seen the child alone at the rest area.

About turn - they were reunited with him a couple of hours later.

So, how could parents apparently "forget" one of their children?

It sounds even weirder than the recent case of the man who left his wife at the side of the road in the dead of night without realising she was missing.

That also happened in the southwest of France - is there something in the water perhaps?

Well there's a simple and innocent enough explanation according to the national daily France Soir.

When the family stopped, all three children were apparently asleep in the back of the camping car.

But while the parents stretched their legs, the eight-year-old slipped out without them noticing.

So they didn't really "forget" him. They just didn't realise he wasn't there.

In their infinite wisdom, the police have decided not to pursue the case, putting it all down to fatigue and a momentary lack of attention at the end of a long journey.

Maybe though, as the regional daily Midi Libre comments, the couple will light up a candle or two in thanks at their final destination.

One thing is for certain - it's a holiday neither the boy nor his parents will forget in a hurry.

A "perfect" summer job

There were probably plenty of disappointed applicants last year when Briton Ben Southall beat out over 34,000 others to become caretaker of an Australian tropical island for six months in the so-called "Best job in the world".

But now a similar position of sorts is up for grabs in France, albeit for a limited period and with a distinctive - how to put it? - French touch perhaps.

It's the "Summer job of 2010" (le "job de l'été 2010") offered by the tourist office of the seaside town of Les Sables-d'Olonne and involves - among other things - spreading suntan lotion on holidaymakers: a six week stint which will earn the lucky recruits €5,000.

Photo, Payton Chung from Chicago, USA - from Wikipedia

Actually there isn't just one position as a "creamer" (yep that really is the name the organisers have dreamt up for the job) available but two, as François Boche the director of the town's tourist office explained on national radio.

And the successful candidates won't just be rubbing lotion into sunbathers who've perhaps forgotten to bring along some protection.

"We're looking for a young woman and a young man and applicants will be judged on their ability to get along with members of the public," he said.

"And they'll also need to have some knowledge of health issues and in particular the need to wear sun protection," he continued.

"As well as applying lotion to sunbathers, the successful candidates will be offering advice and information on sun protection," he added.

"And they'll be handing out free samples from the company sponsoring the whole operation."

Ah yes. The "Summer job of 2010" isn't just a public service aimed at increasing awareness of the need to protect against the sun's rays, but also a marketing strategy, and Boche admits that the relatively high pay - €5,000 for just six weeks work - is also a way for the town to promote itself.

So how do all those aspiring "creamers" who want to spend six weeks in July and August on the beaches of the western coast of France actually go about applying?

Well first up they'll have to submit a 45-second video (as well as communications skills and "some knowledge of health issues" they'll presumably also need to be attractive) and a brief curriculum vitæ outlining why they want the job, online.



A site has been set up specifically for applications.

They're then encouraged to mobilise support among their "network of friends online through Facebook, Twitter or email" because the initial voting process is open to anyone logging on to the site.

In June, the 10 candidates with the highest number of votes will then appear before a jury which will choose the two winners.

Just for the record, and for those of you who might be popping along to the beach at Les Sables-d'Olonne some time over the summer and aren't too thrilled at the thought of a complete stranger offering to apply suntan lotion, Boche has a few words of comfort.

"To avoid any problems, the two 'creamers' will only be proposing to apply protection to the upper back and the arms," he said.

"And as far as children are concerned, it'll only be done in the presence of the parents."

French government takes a break

You know summer is well and truly in full swing when the country's politicians pack up their bags and head off on their hols.

This year the French president, Nicolas Sarkozy, has given government ministers a three-week break.

Set aside the weather, disregard perhaps that it's the silly season for television and in particular for news, with so-called lighter stories dominating the bulletins.

Don't even think about the traffic chaos predicted for this weekend as juilletists (those who traditionally take their break in July) pack their bags and head home to be replaced by aoutiens (August holidaymakers) searching for sun: the two clogging motorway lanes, filling the airports to bursting point and battling for position at the major railway stations in the annual "crossover".

No, the real point of interest is how the country will manage for a couple of weeks as government ministers go on vacation.

Have no fears, this isn't a list of ALL 39 ministers and their chosen destinations. Instead it's a brief and less-than-serious look at where some of them are planning to spend the next few weeks, remembering all the time that a reported 51 per cent of French cannot afford to go away on holiday this year.

First up (of course) is the one person who isn't strictly speaking a minister; Sarkozy.

After his recent "malaise" - or "nerve attack" as it was first reported by some media outlets - he'll probably find it a little easier than might otherwise have been the case to follow doctors' advice and scale down his activities.

He'll be spending a quiet couple of weeks with his wife, Carla, at his parents-in-law's little pad in Cap Nègre in the south of France.

Not among his list of visitors presumably will be Jacques Laisné, the former prefect of the department of Var, where the Bruni-Tedeschi house is located.

Laisné lost his job a couple of months ago in the "septic tank" affair, in which he reportedly reneged on a promise to Sarkozy sort out a dispute over whether to replace the existing system of septic tanks with mains drainage and sewage system.

You can read more about that here.

Perhaps the minister who faces the toughest job come September when there'll be La Rentrée (the time when everyone gets back to work and schools reopen after the summer break) is the health minister, Roselyne Bachelot.

Without specifying exactly where she'll be passing her time, Bachelot has promised to remain "a maximum of one hour" from her ministry, ready to tackle any threat there might be from the expected H1N1 outbreak.

Another couple of government members for whom you could well spare a thought perhaps are the minister of finance, Christine Lagarde, and the minister of employment, Xavier Darcos.

They'll both be reportedly taking along work with them.

Ah such is the life for those in office.

And then there's the minister of industry, Christian Estrosi, who has recently faced a number of ongoing disputes, most notably the threat of of workers at the bankrupt New Fabris car factory in Chatellerault, southwest of Paris, to blow up the factory.

He says he'll only be taking long weekends because anything else would "be unreasonable".

Some though can apparently afford time for a proper holiday, and a couple of them could even bump into each other.

Both Eric Woerth, minister of budget, and the newly-appointed junior minister of housing, Benoist Apparu, will both be spending their time in the same place; Corsica in the Mediterranean.

And if they're very lucky they could enjoy a tête-à-tête-à-tete with the general secretary of their party ( Union pour un Mouvement Populaire, Union for a Popular Movement,UMP), Xavier Bertrand, who is also scheduled to be staying on “L'île de Beauté” or the island of beauty.

Sarkozy, along with many of his ministers look set to be following the French habit of tending not to travel abroad (90 per cent of them holiday in France). But there is an exception.

The prime minister, François Fillon, will once again travel south to Tuscany in Italy.

Oh well, there's always one, isn't there?

Beach time in the City of Lights

Paris Plages is back for the eighth time. It's a month-long event that transforms part of the banks of the river Seine that runs through the French capital into beaches - as the name suggests.

Organised by the City authorities it's described as a "Seine-side holiday" and doubtless will come as a welcome distraction for the increasing number of French - Parisians included - who, given the economic downturn, won't have the spare centimes to afford an annual break.

Indeed "summertime solidarity" is the theme the mayor of Paris, Bertrand Delanoë, is stressing for this year's event, which officially opened on Monday and will run until August 20.

Love it or loathe it, there's no denying the mark Paris Plages has made on the French capital since it was inaugurated back in 2002.

For sure motorists who have the misfortune of discovering their regular routes blocked because the busy voie Georges Pompidou is closed to traffic and finding alternative routes can be a nightmare, might be less than happy.

But even the grouchiest city dweller working through the month of August (yes, Paris might traditionally all but "shuts shop" for a month, nevertheless there are still some who make the journey to and from their offices each day) would be hard pushed to find fault in a concept which has welcomed an ever-increasing number of visitors every year.

And let's face it, if it were such a bad thing, then other cities, such as Toulouse in the southwest of France or the Belgian capital, Brussels, wouldn't end up copying the idea.

Sand, palms trees, deck chairs and ice cream - all the elements necessary for a beach holiday - slap bang in the centre of one of the world's major capital cities!

However even if the idea of Paris Plages is to give those living in the region a taste of what they might be able to experience in traditional seaside locations, it isn't just about beaches.

Sure visitors can practise their canoeing skills, take in a game of pétanque, or enjoy any number of water sports (and others too) that might be on offer elsewhere, but there are also a whole host of cultural and educational events organised to run throughout the month.

Every Sunday for example there are guided walking tours offering visitors the chance to learn more about the capital and its history. And a number of concerts from artists such as Charlie Winston and Amadou and Miriam have also been scheduled.

If, in your opinion, exercise and culture all require a little too much effort - and of course the weather plays ball - then there's always the option of simply relaxing on a deck chair on one of the beaches to soak up the sun.

A couple of points worth mentioning if you're planning a trip to Paris intent on enjoying the beaches.

Swimming in the Seine itself is not allowed. Instead there's a floating pool for visitors to splash around in.

And although allowed on many other beaches up and down the country, nude sunbathing is a big no-no, as is what would be considered "indecent or inappropriate clothing".

So be careful what you wear and don't take off all your garb.

Bonnes vacances.

A slice of life in France - as seen through the back door - Joigny

Many French have been on the move this past weekend - quite literally so.

It was the start of the summer holidays: the period when the capital's major railway stations are usually chock-a-block with travellers, the airports witness a surge in those looking to make a quick getaway and there's the almost traditional chaos on the country's motorways.

The first weekend of July this year proved to be no exception to that rule with national radio reporting at midday on Saturday alone, a peak of around 400 kilometres of tailbacks as many took to their cars.

In spite of the busy start, this year is expected to be a tough one for the country's tourist industry.

Indeed studies carried out a few months ago repeatedly indicated that many here would be tightening their belts with anything up to 51 per cent saying they would be "staying at home" rather than taking to the skies for far flung destinations.

Whether that'll turn out to be the case of course will become clear as the summer progresses and the official figures start rolling in.

For the moment though, the juilletists, those who take their break in July, have begun their customary break, while the aoûtiens, who surprise, surprise, plump for August, are still at work.

France of course is a country steeped in history, with some spectacular scenery, and even the most incapable of photographers is up to the job of snapping at least one picture worth sharing especially in the days of the digital camera.

While the south has some of the best weather and never fails to attract millions of sun worshippers, the western coastline is also pretty much of a tourist magnet. Both the mountain regions of the Alps and the Pyrénées offer stunning all-year-round possibilities to vacationers, and so the list goes on and on.

In fact the visitor is spoilt for choice and perhaps best of all, wherever you choose to go there'll be the chance to sample the local tipple and tickle those tastebuds.

But away from the most obvious destinations, there's also a way of seeing another side of France - through the back door if you like - via the network of canals that run the length and breadth of the country.

They offer a more relaxed and slightly slower alternative and it's a way to sample much of the natural beauty France has to offer as well as soaking up more culture and history than you can probably manage.

There are plenty of companies offering boats for hire and a cruising holiday can perhaps most be compared to being a sort of caravan-on-the-water experience - without the traffic jams - where you can change location as much (or as little) as you like and dictate the pace yourself.

It's also the kind of holiday that opens up the chance to visit places that might otherwise not appear on the traditional tourist's agenda.

One such is the case of the area around Joigny on the river Yonne in northern Burgundy, just where the rolling hills of the countryside begin and the food and drink starts getting very interesting.

It's just over two hours (by car) from the capital and in these belt-tightening times is the ideal place for a weekend break or a longer more relaxed stay.

It's the sort of town which perhaps in more prosperous times, when Parisians were willing and able to dig a little deeper into their pockets, might have been second-home territory.

With just over 10,000 people, it's small but with some stunning architecture that reflects its history throughout the centuries.

The grand half-timbered medieval buildings, almost lean in towards each other along the town centre's narrow streets, although many could do with a little bit of TLC.

It can also be the starting point for a trip up the river towards Sens, passing lazily through Villeneuve-sur-Yonne, or heading off in the other direction to Auxerre and the beginning of over 1,000 kilometres of navigable canals.

Whichever you choose, you can determine for yourself how fast and how far you go as there really is no rush to get anywhere in particular

The locks are easy to negotiate and manageable for even the most vehement couch potato, so you can sit back, relax and simply enjoy the scenery...oh yes, and try your hand at taking some snapshots.

The holiday that was, then wasn’t and now is

This is the rather muddled tale of the public holiday that disappeared from the French calendar four years ago when it became a quasi-working day. But lo and behold, and hallelujah, everything’s back to normal at last and lundi Pentecôte, or Whit Monday, is once again a day off.

Up until 2004 it always was. Whit Monday was Whit Monday clear and simple – and nobody worked (just for a change).

The seeds of confusion were sown in 2003 though as the government sought a knee-jerk response to the fatal heat wave in June of that year, which killed more than 11,000 (mainly) elderly people. Some bright spark hit on the idea of scrapping Whit Monday as a holiday and replacing it with a “Day of Solidarity.”

No more public holiday and instead people would work and income generated from that day (estimated at around €2 billion) would boost the (tax) coffers to care for the elderly and handicapped.

Good idea – Right? Only on paper, and perhaps not even on that!

What mustn’t be forgotten is that much of the country’s workforce was already struggling with the 35-hour working week and the requirement to take a certain number of “enforced” days off (RTTs) a year to keep to the letter of the law.

So many companies saw the new “non holiday” as a chance to oblige employees to use up one of those RTTs and closed for business. Meanwhile others chose to remain open, leaving it to individuals to decide whether they went to work or claimed the day as an RTT (which they were of course entitled to do).

The result on an annual basis was nothing short of a fiasco. Schools closed, but many parents were at work; a couple of government ministries reported for business as usual but others put up shop for the day. And so this list continues. Bedlum pure and simple.

Last year saw the election of a new president, a new government and perhaps one of the simplest jobs anyone in politics has ever had to do – reinstating Whit Monday as a holiday. After all it’s not as if anybody is really going to take to the streets to protest.

And as if to herald the fact that Whit Monday is officially back with a vengeance, the French will be taking an extra long break this year.

May 8 of course commemorates Victory in Europe day – needless to say another public holiday here in France – and this year it falls on a Thursday. Never shy of making the most of a good thing, many people will be “making the bridge” and skipping work on Friday.

As Whit Monday falls on May 12, France isn’t likely to reopen for business properly until Tuesday. In other words a great chunk of the population will be celebrating a mere five-day weekend.

Not bad going in a country whose president is always stressing the need to work more to earn more and where economic growth for the year is regularly being revised downwards.

Happy holidays.

The pheasants aren’t revolting.

And they probably are eating cake

It’s July 14, a day to celebrate the storming of the Bastille and a stand against the tyranny of absolutism. A day of national celebration, pomp and military might here in France. After a night of fireworks, there’s a televised military parade along the world’s self-proclaimed Greatest Avenue with “les enfants de la patrie” remaining glued to their telly screens early afternoon in eager anticipation of The Wise One’s words.

But wait. Something’s not quite right here. Where’s that programme schedule?

Ah there it is…..Saturday….Saturday. Right TF1 08h55 - 12h05 “July 14 parade”. OK OK everything normal then. 12h05.a GAMESHOW. Huh? That can’t be right. Wait a mo’. France 2. 08h30 – yep “July 14 parade,” 11h55 – a DOCUMENTARY. France 3? Tour de France. What has happened? Where’s the President? Where’s the call to the hearts and souls of this nation’s folk? Where’s the trumpeting pride and call to the barricades that unites this European powerhouse? Where’s the French equivalent of the Queen’s Christmas message?

That’s right. He’s at it again. Breaking with tradition Nicolas Sarkozy has said there is absolutely no need for him to continue the ridiculous nonsense of “addressing the nation” on this day in particular. When he has something to say, he’ll pitch up on telly and say it BASTA.

Sounds like a wonderful piece of autocratic intervention perhaps whenever the mood suits him and it’ll undoubtedly give more grist to the mill in the cafés on the Left bank where the intellectuals are already pulling the man apart over his “unseemly and demeaning” habit of going for a morning jog. In their view it’s one apparent national scandal piled on top of another. And all the while he’s threatening to disrupt the status quo even further by a general overhaul of the institutions that define the very character of the country. He has set up a new all-party commission charged with making recommendations for constitutional form. By November 1!

Gulp. This “hyper presidency” is cracking along at a staggering pace. Will we all be able to keep up? Looking at the reaction of the opposition parties – probably not, especially as the whole country is about to go AWOL for two months. And all this “consultation “over university, health, environment and labour reform is bound to throw a spanner in the works of any credible opposition. Not to mention the fact that he keeps appointing opposition leaders to important domestic posts and recommending them for jobs abroad.

Still there’s always the July 14 Garden Party to look forward to. He hasn’t scrapped that and the weather’s good. And for sure Cecilia will look as radiant as ever in some stunning frock. Only hope there’s a little more than lemonade and iced tea on the drinks trolley as Sarkozy is a confirmed teetotal. Yikes a Frenchman who doesn’t drink. Thankfully he’s not vegetarian. Wonder what’s on the menu?

Pheasant perhaps?

The holiday that isn’t

I’ve promised myself for over a week now to write something about lundi Pentecôte or Whit Monday but haven’t really had the guts to tackle it.

The status the day has achieved over the last few years reflects all that is wonderfully maddening and completely confusing about France. It makes absolutely no sense to the French. So what chance does a foreigner have even one living here?

It’s refreshing to see how little impact the Protestant Work Ethic has had here in France. The French are renowned for getting their priorities right (in my book at least) and along with their Mediterranean neighbours tend to work to live rather than the other way round that prevails in normally colder European climes. Yes perhaps I’m stretching a point here and flexing a few clichés, but there’s undoubtedly a hint of the truth.

So how to explain the public holiday that is officially at least no longer. But thereagain it sort of is still a holiday for most people rather than the working day it was meant to become back in 2004.

It’s the French idea of Solidarity. Nothing will become clearer. You have been warned. Reach for the gin now before it’s too late

Up until 2004 all was fine and dandy in the garden of French public holidays. Whit Monday was Whit Monday clear and simple – and nobody worked (just for a change).

The seeds of confusion were sown in 2003 though as the government sought a knee-jerk response to the fatal heatwave in June of that year, which killed more than 11,000 (mainly) elderly people. Some bright spark in Chirac’s government hit on the idea of scrapping Whit Monday as a holiday and replacing it with a Day of Solidarity.

No more public holiday and instead people would work and income generated from that day (estimated at around €2 billion) would boost the (tax) coffers to care for the elderly and handicapped.

Good idea – Right? Only on paper, and perhaps not even on that!

What mustn’t be forgotten is that much of the country’s workforce is already struggling with the 35-hour working week and the requirement to take a certain number of “enforced” days off (RTTs) a year to keep to the letter of the law.

So many bosses saw the new “non holiday” as a chance to oblige employees to use up one of those RTTs and closed for business. Meanwhile others chose to remain open, leaving it to individuals to decide whether they went to work or claimed the day as an RTT (which they were of course entitled to do).

Result? Well after the fiasco of the last two years when for example some schools were open and others closed; a couple of government ministries reported for business as usual but others put up shop for the day, the State finally caved in and gave its own employees the day off.

But it hasn’t helped. This year 60 per cent of the population took the day off and 40 percent struggled to work (public transport of course operates a holiday service). It was hard to guess what would and wouldn’t be open or whether anyone apart from the office cleaner or security guard would be there to answer the number you were calling if you did show up for work.

So much for Solidarity then! And to spice up the mess one loopy Socialist parliamentarian actually called for a strike to demonstrate against a law which required people to lose a day’s (RTT) holiday if their company forced them to take the day off. Don’t think too many people turned up!

And just to sum up this complete idiocy – an anecdote. The centre where Hen works (you know, the one which employs several thousand people – many of them completely incompetent it would seem to destroy/save the planet, depending on how look at things) operates its own bus service for employees – arriving at 09h and leaving at 17h (ON THE DOT). Most commendable!

The centre decided to close on Monday – remember enforced RTT (just checking that you are still following). But somehow, somewhere the day of Solidarity didn’t exactly fit in with the 35-hour working week, which meant that everyone ran the risk of “losing” an hour or “giving up” an hour too many of “Solidarity”. Solution? The buzzer went one hour earlier on the Friday evening and everyone who was bus-bound pootled off at 16h.

I love the French

Forget the tonic, I’ll have the Gordon’s straight – preferably from the bottle.