The pheasants aren’t revolting.

And they probably are eating cake

It’s July 14, a day to celebrate the storming of the Bastille and a stand against the tyranny of absolutism. A day of national celebration, pomp and military might here in France. After a night of fireworks, there’s a televised military parade along the world’s self-proclaimed Greatest Avenue with “les enfants de la patrie” remaining glued to their telly screens early afternoon in eager anticipation of The Wise One’s words.

But wait. Something’s not quite right here. Where’s that programme schedule?

Ah there it is…..Saturday….Saturday. Right TF1 08h55 - 12h05 “July 14 parade”. OK OK everything normal then. 12h05.a GAMESHOW. Huh? That can’t be right. Wait a mo’. France 2. 08h30 – yep “July 14 parade,” 11h55 – a DOCUMENTARY. France 3? Tour de France. What has happened? Where’s the President? Where’s the call to the hearts and souls of this nation’s folk? Where’s the trumpeting pride and call to the barricades that unites this European powerhouse? Where’s the French equivalent of the Queen’s Christmas message?

That’s right. He’s at it again. Breaking with tradition Nicolas Sarkozy has said there is absolutely no need for him to continue the ridiculous nonsense of “addressing the nation” on this day in particular. When he has something to say, he’ll pitch up on telly and say it BASTA.

Sounds like a wonderful piece of autocratic intervention perhaps whenever the mood suits him and it’ll undoubtedly give more grist to the mill in the cafés on the Left bank where the intellectuals are already pulling the man apart over his “unseemly and demeaning” habit of going for a morning jog. In their view it’s one apparent national scandal piled on top of another. And all the while he’s threatening to disrupt the status quo even further by a general overhaul of the institutions that define the very character of the country. He has set up a new all-party commission charged with making recommendations for constitutional form. By November 1!

Gulp. This “hyper presidency” is cracking along at a staggering pace. Will we all be able to keep up? Looking at the reaction of the opposition parties – probably not, especially as the whole country is about to go AWOL for two months. And all this “consultation “over university, health, environment and labour reform is bound to throw a spanner in the works of any credible opposition. Not to mention the fact that he keeps appointing opposition leaders to important domestic posts and recommending them for jobs abroad.

Still there’s always the July 14 Garden Party to look forward to. He hasn’t scrapped that and the weather’s good. And for sure Cecilia will look as radiant as ever in some stunning frock. Only hope there’s a little more than lemonade and iced tea on the drinks trolley as Sarkozy is a confirmed teetotal. Yikes a Frenchman who doesn’t drink. Thankfully he’s not vegetarian. Wonder what’s on the menu?

Pheasant perhaps?