François Hollande named “Statesman of the year”

Um

Say what?

That’s surely the only way to react to the news that the French president, François Hollande, has been honoured as International Statesman of the Year.

The prize, which is awarded by the New York-based interfaith Appeal of Conscience foundation recognises “individuals who support peace, prosperity, liberty and promote tolerance, human dignity and human rights, both in their own countries and internationally through cooperation with other leaders”.

François Hollande (screenshot from Le Monde/Reuters video of acceptance speech)

Right, that’s the news angle, and maybe the international community knows something the French don’t. But does Hollande really merit the award?

After all poll after (endless) poll in this country only emphasises Hollande’s unpopularity with the electorate at home and the frustration there has been with his seemingly trademark “waffling” approach to governing.

As Hollande’s five years near their end, what have been the highlights of his term in office?

In no particular order:

Julie Gayet and the scooter.
The ceremonious (and acrimonious) dumping of not-quite first lady Valérie Trierweiler
Ace government appointments such as Jérôme Cahuzac (the minister of economy, charged with fighting tax fraud who…well, you can probably guess the rest) and Thomas Thévenoud (the trade minister who “forgot” to pay his tax bill…for three years)
Electorally courting the Greens, including them in government and then seeing the “principled” Cécile Duflot flounce out of office.
Facing the wrath of so-called Frondeurs of his own party, abandoning Socialist party principles but refusing to endorse completely those of Social democracy.
Being (and this takes some doing) abandoned by government ministers on the left of his party - Arnaud Montebourg, Benoît Hamon and Aurélie Filippetti and those on the right - Emmanuel Macron (all right, so Manuel Valls has stuck the course, but most political commentators would argue that he has his own agenda).
Telling the French endlessly that unemployment would drop and staking his future on it.
Making administration easier (huh?), reducing the number of regions (at what price?), shifting a dollop of the state’s tax burden to those very same regions.
Oh yes - same sex marriage.

On the whole, a pretty grim and disappointing track record - domestically speaking.

So, to abroad - foreign policy; an area in which every French president stamps his authority.

Just a sampling.

French intervention in Mali and Syria, the battle against Daesch, the handling of refugees in Europe…the list could go on…have, and let’s be brutally honest about it, hardly been resounding triumphs in French foreign policy and ergo for Hollande.

And that term “Statesmanship”.

Take a look around the Net and you’ll come up with several key elements (and, as in all matters of this nature, there is no one clear definition, so the meaning of the term is open to some degree of interpretation) that are embodied in being a statesman.

“Having a bedrock of principles, a moral compass, a vision. And an ability to build a consensus to achieve that vision.”

Hollande? Really?

Or how about this?

"A person who is skilled in the management of public or national affairs." or, in determining the difference between a politician and a statesman, “A politician works with details. A statesman works with ideas.”

Ditto.

And this?

“A person who is experienced in the art of government or versed in the administration of government affairs” and “A person who exhibits great wisdom and ability in directing the affairs of a government or in dealing with important public issues.”

Double ditto.

Now, while Hollande might score (just) on some of these points, he clearly misses big time on many.

Certainly he has had to deal with the terrorist attacks in France during his time in office. And few could argue that he has led the nation’s mourning with exceptional dignity.

But that in itself cannot warrant the award of International statesman of the year.

And maybe Hollande recognised that fact in his acceptance speech on Monday, realising that the award was not for just one man, but for a nation.

“It honours France,” he said. An inspiring France which defends  liberty, democracy and human rights everywhere.”

And referring to the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks,  he continued, “ On that day we were all American. Today we are all French.”

Whatever happened to François Hollande's camel? The answer

As if you needed reminding, things aren't going too well for the French president, François Hollande, at the moment.

The Cahuzac affair and low poll ratings aside, there's another example of just how bad things have become.

The fate of the "presidential" camel.

No, not a reference to anyone in particular at the Elysée palace, but rather the gift from the people of Mali back in February to the French president as a "thank you" to Hollande for "liberating" the country.

Remember how during a visit to Timbuktu, Hollande was somewhat upstaged by the bellowing from the young camel (or dromedary to be entirely accurate) and promised - none too seriously - that he would, "use it as a means of transportation as often as possible."

Plans to have the animal shipped back to France though, came to nothing and instead the Powers That Be decided it would better off remaining in Mali and being looked after by a local family.

Except - the least that can be said - is that things don't appear to have turned out very well for the camel.

As reported in the French media, the defence minister, Jean-Yves Le Drian, who among his many, very important responsibilities has been charged with giving the government weekly updates on the camel's well-being, was informed last week that it was no longer with us.

It had been eaten.

No comment from the Elysée palace yet.

But for those who wish to remember the animal's Warhol-like 15 minutes of fame, here's that video from February again.

No room at the Elysée for France's wannabe "presidential cow"

It hasn't been a particularly good week for the French president François Hollande.

Well certainly not as far as potential presidential pets are concerned.

First up of course there was the bellowing camel offered to him by grateful Malians, and then reports that it had been stolen and wouldn't after all be making its way to France.

Now comes the tale of a cow that has - in a manner of speaking - been refused entry to the lawns of the French president's official residence, the Elysée palace.

It's seems representatives from the Association des éleveurs bovins or Cattle breeding association (somehow the French seems more...er...poetic) wanted to show their...um...appreciation of the French president ahead of this year's Salon d'Agriculture which opens in Paris on February 23.

What better way, they must have thought, than to offer him his own cow?

After all, there aren't any other pets at the presidential pad right now.

François Hollande at Salon d'Agriculture, 2012 (screenshot France Télévisions report)

Well, while Hollande was in Brussels cutting a budget deal with the other leaders of the European Union, it was left up to officials at the Elysée palace to break the bad news to the association, that no, they wouldn't be allowed to hand over the beast in person.

Instead, they'll just have to hope that Hollande pops in to pay them a visit during the agricultural fair.

All a bit of a shame really because, as you can see from the video, Hollande was up close and personal with cows during his marathon 12-hour visit to the annual fair last year.

Heck he even helped give one of them a shower.

There again, he was in campaigning mode.

Moo!

What next for François Hollande's camel?

You might well have seen the pictures over the weekend - delighted Malians welcoming their all-conquering hero, the French president François Hollande, during his visit to Timbuktu.

Unable to contain their joy they smiled, danced, sang and...made him an offer he couldn't refuse.

A camel.

(screenshot from news report)

"I will use it as a means of transportation as often as possible," quipped Hollande, appearing somewhat fazed by the gift and brandishing a whip he had also been given (for training purposes of course).

Mind you, it's remarkable microphones managed to pick up any of his response above the bellowing protests of the young animal lying in front of him, ready for its new "mission".



Twitter of course had a field day with the story. There were, unsurprisingly perhaps, more than a just few (unkind) references to France's first lady Valérie Trierweiler appearing among the responses along the lines of "Malians have offered Hollande a camel. Didn't anyone tell them he already has one at home?" and "François Hollande receives a camel as a present on his arrival in Mali. Won't Valérie be jealous?"

The mainstream media picked up on Hollande's quip, detailed how the animal had now been elevated to the status of "presidential camel" but nonetheless would have to go through the same procedure as any other animal being imported into France from Mali.

After all this would also be "un chameau normal pour un président normal" was the tone.

It would spend a couple of weeks in the zoo in the Malian capital Bamako, reported RTL radio, followed by a medical, a period of quarantine and vaccinations before being flown to France.

But now comes the news that could put the proverbial spanner in the works for a somewhat unusual presidential pet: the camel offered to Hollande was allegedly a stolen one.

A man, currently living in a refugee camp in Mali has come forward saying he was the original owner, the animal had been stolen from him and he wants it back.

No official word from the Elysée palace as to the fate of the camel...and no activity on Valérie Trierweiler's Twitter account to give us all the scoop.

Friday's French music break - Inna Modja, "French Cancan (Monsieur Sainte Nitouche)"

Friday's French music break this week is in Franglais.

Inna Modja's "French Cancan" uses a simple combination of instantly recognisable French words that everyone will know in an essentially English language song.

Inna Modja (screenshot from official video)

It's a little like telling someone you speak Italian and then stringing together "Spaghetti, ravioli, mamma mia, mozzarella di bufala, Giorgio Armani."

It's a fun and simple technique but a very effective.

And it's helped by mixing in a catchy tune that definitely has something of a 60s feel to it, a video with some extremely big hair, and voilà - guaranteed airplay and a song that has been a hit in France for the best part of the summer.

(screenshot from official video)

Originally from Bamako in Mali, Modja now lives in Paris.

The name "Modja" (she was born Inna Bocoum) meaning "naughty girl" Pulaar is, according to her Facebook page, "A nickname my mother gave me when I was being a nuisance."

Modja says she began singing in a choir when she was six years old and her earliest influences were singers her parents listened to such as Ray Charles, Ella Fitzgerald, Otis Redding or Sarah Vaughan.

Those were followed by music her older brothers and sisters listened to - Punk, Trash, Heavy Metal, Soul and Funk...well just about anything and everything.

"Today my music is the result of all that mix and when I compose, I do so instinctively," she said in an interview on TV5 Monde after the release of her debut album "Everyday Is a New World" last year and the success of the single "Mister H".

"There are a lot of artists I listen to that I like. I wouldn't say it had a direct influence on the album - but certainly on me."

Anyway, enough words. Take a listen to the song.

It's delightful.