The "proper" way to smack a child

All right so it's not exactly what a report on TF1's prime time news on Tuesday evening was saying, but in a way, it surely wasn't far from it.

It's all a matter of interpretation.

"Bon usage de la fessée" ran the title of a three-and-a-half minute clip introduced by anchor Laurence Ferrari and although it has been tempered somewhat on the site to read "Pour bien punir ses enfants, tout est question de mesure" the underlying message remains the same doesn't it?

TF1's report was part of an ongoing series looking at the education - in the broad sense of the word - of children and featured a couple with three young boys.

The mother, Marie-Laure Vital, admitted, just as 80 per cent of French parents apparently do, that she occasionally smacks her children.

Vital sometimes feels "unable to cope" and because she reportedly often feels that the punishment - whatever form it might take - isn't doing its job properly or is inappropriate, she has joined a workshop which specifically teaches parenting skills.

"L'atelier des parents" is a one of a kind in France and on the agenda during TF1's filming was the subject of punishment, with one of the workshop's psychologists, Caroline Iruela, detailing what sort of discipline was unacceptable and the eight parents present exchanging their experiences.

So far so good.

But then up pops a doctor - a paediatrician no less - with over 30 years experience.

And while he maintains, just as you would expect from a professional that, "If smacking is carried out to hurt or publicly humiliate a child, it's not effective" take a look at his gesture as he begins this contribution.

Doesn't it seem to imply that an "appropriate" slap on the hands is perfectly all right as it doesn't really constitute smacking?

Last year after a woman was given a six-month suspended sentence for smacking her child, the lines of a 'phone-in programme on national radio were buzzing with indignation.

Listeners were appalled by the decision and critical of the invited guest, paediatrician and parliamentarian Edwige Antier. who has tried to introduce a law to ban smacking.

"A mother should be a 'protector' and what's needed in France is a law, as exists in 18 other European countries, abolishing the right parents have to hit a child," said Antier during the show.

It wasn't a point of view with which many listeners agreed and they're not alone.

A 2010 poll among health professionals showed that 88 per cent of them were also against the introduction of such a law.

While domestic corporal punishment, of which smacking is one form, is against the law in many European countries, it seems to be acceptable in France.

Screenshot from Council of Europe video "Raise your hand against smacking"

And while the prevailing thinking runs along the lines of "A smack from time to time has never hurt anyone," (read some of the comments to TF1's report), that 2008 Council of Europe "Raise your hand against smacking" campaign calling on all member states to pass laws prohibiting all forms of corporal punishment of children, including smacking, looks set to have little impact on lawmakers here.

Smacking's all right isn't it? As long as it's done "properly".

French woman receives six-month suspended sentence for smacking her child

Screenshot from Council of Europe video "Raise your hand against smacking"

"Yes I was smacked and it never did me any harm. In fact I deserved it," said one caller to Jean-Marc Morandini's 'phone-in programme on Europe 1 radio on Thursday.

"Smacking is not the same as child abuse, don't try to exaggerate," said another.

Both were responding to comments by Morandini's invited guest, paediatrician Edwige Antier, who was on the show to talk about spanking and the need for a law in France to ban it.

Antier was defending a ruling earlier this week in which a court in northern France gave a woman a six-month suspended sentence and ordered her to receive psychological counselling, after finding her guilty of wilful violence towards a minor for having slapped her nine-year-old daughter.

The incident that led to the woman being found guilty dates back to last December.

As reported in the French media, the woman, who had apparently been drinking, slapped her daughter during an argument at home.

The girl ran out of the house and into the street where she was intercepted by a passerby who happened to be a social worker.

Seeing the state the girl was in, the social worker took her to the nearest police station.

Her mother was then brought in for questioning and charged.

"The punishment is totally out of proportion," said the woman's lawyer, Alice Cohen-Sabban, after the suspended sentence was handed down.

"She has never needed social services to intervene for anything, she has never been convicted and although she had been drinking when the incident happened she is not an alcoholic," Cohen-Sabban told Agence France Presse.

But that's not quite how Antier sees it - or any other case of smacking come to that.

And when Morandini asked her whether she found the ruling "normal" the 68-year-old, who is also a member of parliament for the centre-right Union pour un Mouvement Populaire (Union for a Popular Movement, UMP) and tabled a bill in 2009 to make domestic corporal punishment unlawful in France, was quite clear about where she stands.

"Imagine you were faced with someone you knew who was much larger than you and had been drinking, and they turned round and hit you," she retorted.

"Would you find that normal?

"The law as it stands at the moment gives a mother the right to hit a child, and even a babysitter, if the motive is 'an educational one'," she continued.

"But the mother should be a 'protector' and what's needed in France is a law, as exists in 18 other European countries, abolishing the right parents have to hit a child."

Not many of the callers to the programme seemed to agree with her.

Nor did a lot of the comments left on French websites such as that of Le Point or Radio France Internationale in reaction to the suspended sentence handed down to the woman and the issue of smacking in general.

Ranging from " it doesn't do any harm," through "limits need to be set and children have to be disciplined" to "the sentencing in this case will just do more harm than good to the family and especially the girl involved," it certainly seems as though Antier's views put her in the minority.

And that's perhaps not surprising as a poll conducted among health professionals in France just last year showed that 88 per cent of them were against the introduction of a law banning smacking.

Domestic corporal punishment, of which smacking is one form, is against the law in many European countries, but not in France.

In 2008 the Council of Europe launched its "Raise your hand against smacking campaign" and called on all member states to pass laws prohibiting all forms of corporal punishment of children, including smacking.

Stop child sex abuse - teach The Underwear Rule

A campaign has been launched aimed at raising awareness about child abuse and in particular encouraging children who suffer from it to speak up and get help.

"The Underwear Rule" is part of the Council of Europe's ONE in FIVE campaign to stop sexual violence against children.



According to the Council of Europe statistics one in five children in Europe is a victim of sexual abuse and "it's estimated that in 70 to 85% of cases, the abuser is somebody the child knows and trusts."

"TRUSTS" - did you get that?

The Underwear Rule speaks to children directly and provides "a simple guide to help parents explain to children where others should not try to touch them, how to react and where to seek help."

Kiko (snapshot from television spot)

It includes a television advertisement featuring the cartoon character Kiko telling children what is and isn't acceptable in terms of being touched.

And a 20-page "The Underwear Rule" book can be downloaded free of charge from the campaign's website.

"What is The Underwear Rule?"

"It’s simple," writes Juliet Linley, in her Corriere della Sera column Mamma Mia.

"A child should not be touched by others on parts of the body usually covered by their underwear. And they should not touch others in those areas.

It also helps explain to children that their body belongs to them, that there are good and bad secrets and good and bad touches.

Through its ONE in FIVE campaign, the Council of Europe wants to achieve two main goals:

a) promote the signature, ratification and implementation of the Council of Europe Convention on the Protection of Children against Sexual Exploitation and Sexual Abuse; 


b) equip children, their families/carers and societies at large with knowledge - and tools - to prevent and report sexual violence against children, thereby raising awareness of how widespread sexual violence against children is."

At the launch of the campaign in Rome, Maud de Boer Buquicchio, the deputy secretary-general of the Council of Europe said she hoped it would "inspire countries across the world to tackle the global phenomenon of child abuse," and "make sure international borders are not an obstacle in prosecuting offenders."